For the past sixteen years, I’ve wondered if it was my job to teach people how to handle themselves when someone else suffers a tragedy…no, people of the world, it’s not OK to relate the death of your goldfish to the death of my mother. Sorry. It’s also not the same to relate the death of your 97 year old mother to my 49 year old mother. It’s OK to just say “I’m sorry.” You don’t have to say anything else. Trust me.

Now I’m wondering if it’s my responsibility to teach people how to conduct themselves when faced with someone else’s infertility. The first response should NOT be: “there’s always adoption!” First of all, what a false statement, and second of all, adoption isn’t for everyone! Are you, Mrs. Insensitive, going to pony up the thousands of dollars it costs to adopt a child? Your second response should also not be relating it to an issue you’re having, unless that issue is years of infertility capped with the IVF Talk. Trust me, baby girl, you have no idea. Again, a simple “I’m sorry” is completely sufficient. Better yet – silence with a reassuring hug is even better.

Now, to get everyone to take my advice…