The turtle in the header is there for a reason. She will be our symbol of strength as we go through this journey because they represent not just fertility but strength and perseverance as well…obviously qualities that we value on a regular basis, but particularly now.

I’m wearing an Alex and Ani bracelet with a turtle charm and Shane has a similar keychain. They’re our talismans through this whole process to remember that we are strong, we will persevere…and hopefully we’ll be fertile. 😉

Shane and I signed our consents with Dr. Nash and Emily, one of the IVF nurses, yesterday afternoon…what a trip that is. What happens to the embryos in case of stopping IVF, divorce, or death?! OMG. We have ultimately decided that in nearly every case, we will donate the embryos to research. I’m not comfortable with donation to another couple or discard, so a donation to science will hopefully benefit other couples in the future. Just our personal decision!

After that we did the usual routine: ultrasound, blood work, urine sample. Quite the rotation. Yuck.

After that fun in the lab, we sat down with Emily and went over the injections and medication instructions in general. All told, I will have two injections and four medications daily, along with an aspirin and Vitamin D3. (Yes, in addition to all of the other meds I’m already on!) We are starting meds this weekend, Saturday specifically, which is great because that means Shane will be home for the first injections. I’ll do them myself, but it will be nice to have my other ears here to make sure we remember everything from the injection lessons.

We’re really excited. Nervous to be certain, but really excited.

Surgery.

I haven’t updated since the surgery because I spent the weekend writing the final paper for my Poetry course…and by the way, I found out this evening that I got a 95% on it! Whoo-hoo!

Friday morning, Shane and I went to Akron General Hospital for the surgery. We arrived around 11:30 for the 1:30 procedure. Check in was super easy and I was pleasantly surprised to find that they have a pretty streamlined system for getting you into the system and into a pre-surgery room. After we got our directions and the explanation for their sweet pager system to keep Shane informed all afternoon, we were taken up to a private room on the pre-surgery floor to prep and wait. And wait. And wait some more. I’m sure there’s a reason for making us be there two hours in advance, but the best I could tell was to let me have a really good nap. Shane watched TV on the silent set and I answered the same questions to about four different people: “yes, I’m on Metformin, no I’m not diabetic, no I didn’t eat or drink anything, yes I took my blood pressure meds” were the favorites. The long wait was a little longer because surgery was pushed back from 1:30 to 2:00. Around that time, Dr. Nash, the anesthesiologist, and the two nurses “huddled” in my room, discussed the plans, shot me up with some relaxing drugs, and whisked me away.

Once I was in the room, the procedure was quick. Shane saw Dr. Nash post-surgery by 2:20 and we were reunited by 3:45. Never having anesthesia, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I remember waking up the first time and being pretty disoriented, but cognizant enough to know that I wanted to get the heck out of there! There was some confusion between my nurse and the charge nurse about where we should get the pain prescriptions filled. Apparently that confusion was relayed to poor Shane who had no idea what was happening, just that he was getting conflicting information with each phone call from the recovery floor. When I was finally awake for real, I was still so disoriented (who forgot to tell me to bring glasses instead of contacts? EVERYONE.) and foggy but when I saw Shane’s shape approaching me, I scurried up out of bed, got myself together (I’ll spare you want that means) and we escaped! Or tried, anyway. The confusion over the prescription set us back about fifteen minutes at the hospital pharmacy…we finally made it out the front door and down the road at 4:30.

Shane was super hungry when I left him, so my first question when we were finally rolling was what he had for lunch – he told me “turkey sandwich” and my hazy self heard “chicken soup” – so I was DETERMINED to get some chicken and noodles from Bob Evans on the way home. I take that back…my actual first question was CAN WE GET SOME TACO BELL, PLEEEEEEEEEEEASE?! When he told me NO WAY YOU’LL PUKE, I had to settle for some chicken and noodles. I slept the whole way home but inhaled the food when we got here. Shane had to rush off to work with the promise that he’d check in on me every hour but, turns out, there was no need since I slept pretty much the whole night. I woke up at one point and called my dad but then went right back to sleep.

Saturday morning I woke up feeling great and did so all day until Sunday morning when the cramps set in (or the good pain meds wore off, more likely!). I’ve been pretty crampy since then…the bad news is that the pain medication doesn’t really touch the cramps. The good news is, I’m uncomfortable, not in pain. Turns out it was good news that I had to spent the weekend working on a paper – I had lots of time to recuperate. Today was a bit rough, but I’m hoping for some relief tomorrow.

Speaking of tomorrow, we’re headed down to RGI for our consent meeting, blood work, and ultrasound. I got an email from the office today letting me know that today would be my last birth control pill so I expect that tomorrow will start injections. I’m nervous…but also so very, very excited. What a month it’s been already!

My attempt at an updated schedule with updates in italics:

Day 1: call doctor, check in. (9/23) – done

Day 3: start birth control pill (9/25) – done

Day 12: hysteroscopy and blood work, order injectable medications (10/4) – done

Day 19/26: IVF consent, Shane blood work, injection lessons, ultrasound (originally 10/11 – now 10/18)

NEW: Day 22: Hysteroscopic Polypectomy at Akron General Hospital; Meds arrive at FedEx

Days 27+: lots of shots, probably some ultrasounds (I’m guessing I will start injections right away…with my low follicle number at the last ultrasound, they’re concerned about leaving me on birth control for too long.)

Day 29/36: Egg retrieval, semen deposit (around 10/21 – probably around 10/28ish instead…about a week of stimming drugs)

Day 33: Transfer of Day 5 blastocyst (around 10/26…five days after retrieval…so Day 41 now)

Day 38: HCG/pregnancy test at RGI (around 10/30…nine days after retrieval…now this will be about Day 45…around 11/7ish)

Also, if you’re looking for more information about IVF or other things we mention or that just pop into your head, this is a great resource – Shady Grove Fertility. For example, if you want to read about what stimulating the ovaries looks like, this is a great page. If I’ve learned anything through this ENTIRE process, it’s that knowledge is everything – for everyone involved.

Morning, Pre-Hysteroscopy

Today is the hysteroscopy. The prep involves Advil and water – easy peasy. They’ve said it can be uncomfortable, but at this point, it’s all uncomfortable so that’s par for the course! Speaking of discomfort, we also had some good news about one of our bills…it said the amount due was around $1200, but if we paid by October 7, we only owed $145. I thought that was just a payment, but when I logged into the bill pay system, it said the total due was $145 and when the payment went through, the balance was $0. Hopefully that’s correct since we’re already exhausted our flex savings account that just started at the beginning of September.

Post-Hysteroscopy

Well, that was fun.

Shane and I met at the clinic this afternoon for my hysteroscopy. The nurse took me back, explained everything, showed me the instruments (!!!!), I signed consents, and she brought Shane in. The procedure involves sending different tools up through my cervix (which, apparently, no one else sees as EXIT ONLY!) to see what’s happening in my uterus. This was, by far, the most uncomfortable and painful procedure I’ve had yet. Once again, thank God for Shane. He held my hand, rubbed my head, and was fascinated by it all. I, on the other hand, was SO uncomfortable. It’s a combination of cramping and stabbing, all in front of an audience. What a show! Dr. Nash did find some polyps in my uterus (two, to be exact) so our plans are slightly derailed for now.

After the procedure was over, we met with Connie, the surgical nurse, about the next step. First, our immediate plans are on pause. Next, and more importantly, I will have surgery on October 14 to remove the polyps. The procedure is pretty quick, but it does require sedation, so the recovery is longer than today’s procedure. According to Shane, the polyps looked something like the ones below.

Dr. Nash said that if he were my gynecologist, he would not have worried about these polyps at all, but because we need my uterus to be in tip top shape, we need these polyps gone.

We have been joking tonight about our expectations through all of this…every time we expected something, we were completely wrong. We thought one more med cycle – wrong. IUI next – wrong. IVF cycle going as planned – wrong! We remain as hopeful as ever, but our “plan” is out the window (as, let’s be honest, it should have been weeks ago!).

Family Time.

The journey of telling our friends and family about all of this has evolved from complete silence to slowly letting people in. We’ve now told most of our family about our intended journey, but we still haven’t told everyone, for so many reasons. The most important reason is usually that we prefer to tell everyone in person. This is a lot of information to take in for us, and for our families, and it’s much easier to do it in person. In fact, we met just last night with Shane’s mom and stepdad, grandparents, and sister and we told them all of the gritty details about our entire journey. They were, as was expected, so supportive of it all. It’s taken us this long because Shane inherently very private, but we are working hard to veer away from that and toward openness and sharing. It will be a process, but all of this is easier with support.

I pretty much feel like I’m living a commercial for some sort of indigestion medication. The combination of my meds have destroyed my appetite because everything tastes terribly and makes me so uncomfortable for the rest of the day. Poor Shane made some amazing home made sloppy joe’s – no Manwich for us! They tasted SO good on Sunday and then on Monday (when I started another medication) they made me so sick. Heartburn like crazy all night.

Tuesday is our hysteroscopy and the following Tuesday is our consent, blood work, ultrasound, and shot lessons. I should start injections that following weekend (around the 15th). Hopefully that timing is correct because I have a long weekend then – it would be good to have some time at home to adjust to becoming a human pincushion.

We got the medication quote from the pharmacy and it was $1700 less than we were expecting – wow! It’s still $3300, but that is FAR less than we were expecting to pay. Great news for us! Everything looks like nonsense at this point, but I’m betting we will be experts at all of this very soon!

This week was also our third wedding anniversary (I have to say “wedding” because I like anniversaries! First meeting, first date, first plane ride, etc. but my dear husband says I now only get ONE anniversary. Rude.). This whole process has given us such ups and downs but ultimately, the most important thing is there is no one else in the world that I would want to go through this with…he is the most amazing support I could ever hope to imagine…as much as he wants a baby, he wants what is best and healthiest for us. Thankful isn’t enough, but I’ll say it anyway – thanks bun – I’m thankful for you.

In the interest of oversharing, I got my period today, which makes this Cycle Day 1. I think. I have a call into the nurses to find out if I count today or tomorrow. If it’s today, the timeline below is correct:

Day 1: call doctor, check in. (9/23) – done

Day 3: start birth control pill (9/25) – done

Day 12: hysteroscopy and blood work, order injectable medications (10/4)

Day 19: IVF consent, Shane blood work, injection lessons, ultrasound (10/11)

Days 20-29: lots of shots, probably some ultrasounds

Day 29: Egg retrieval, semen deposit (around 10/21)

Day 33: Transfer of Day 5 blastocyst (around 10/26…five days after retrieval)

Day 38: HCG/pregnancy test at RGI (around 10/30…nine days after retrieval) I’m not sure when we will make this blog public, but if it is before Day 38, we will NOT announce one way or the other for a little while. Just an FYI. 🙂

We went to the required IVF meeting in Akron on Wednesday night with at least twenty other IVF couples…from every walk of life…which was oddly comforting. The embryologist who conducted the meeting did a great job of explaining the whole IVF process and what goes into each step, from the very beginning through the final test. I haven’t been able to read enough about it, but for Shane, this was a great foundation for the information he’s going to need as we go through all of these steps!

Tomorrow I’ll hit up CVS for my birth control (counterintuitive, right?) so we can shut down production before it’s amped up for the end of the cycle. Here we go!

I’ve discovered that there are a whole lot of loving people in the infertility community who are all too happy to step up and share their stories and lend comfort to a terrible  – and frankly, terrifying – process. This kindness didn’t come from a fellow IVF patient – but from someone on the completely opposite end of the fertility spectrum.  (more…)

A few things to share…

1. We had our consult meeting with Dr. Nash last week. A few things: first, we agreed to progress through the treatment plan. Next, we discussed IVF as a whole in detail, and finally (and probably most importantly), we discovered that I have a low follicle count. He says they will have to “jack [me] up” with more meds. Translation: another $500. He gave us a 40% success rate for the first cycle transfer. We also discussed the possibility of a FET (frozen embryo transfer) cycle in the future or if my body isn’t quite ready for a fresh transfer after being “jacked” during the retrieval process.  (more…)